you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
