I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize