this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
