Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
