GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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