the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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