She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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