Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Randomize
