Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
