Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
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