Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
