Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
