the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Randomize
