How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
