Do you still have your period?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I just sucked dick on a ferry
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
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