break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Sponge bath it is.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
