Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
