That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Even my vagina gasped.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
