it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
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