the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
