I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
