I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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