just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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