Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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