I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
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