it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
