i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I need to wash the frat house off of me
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
