nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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