I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
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