Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
people are starting to question the shark bite story
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
