note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
