Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
