Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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