I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
The cops high fived after they tackled you
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize