so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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