Soap is not a condiment
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
