8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize