I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize