I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
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