Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
