I wish i was in the wii world.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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