I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
