Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
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All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
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By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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