The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
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ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
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Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.