Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.