weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
