i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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