At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Randomize