we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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