Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
thus making me awesome and them whores
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
is wine microwaveable?
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
