Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
