My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Randomize
